all i wanna do is let go

I'm lacking something in my life... events. Last year was so great. Everything was so new: the people, the clubs, the experiences. I just miss going to school and sincerely having to wonder what was going to happen next. Like especially the whole thing with Evan... every single day, something new would happen. I'd see him in the hallways and there would be a new comment about us (derogatory or flattery... lol). Or there would be a new place I saw him. Or a new thing he did to me. It was mysterious and unknown. I did not know when it was going to happen, what was going to happen, if something would happen. Looking forward to stupid things like that gave me a thrill every day. That whole experience was something I've never been through before, nor did I ever dream I'd ever go through, because I wasn't exactly a girl that people from my hometown would call "pretty" in middle school. Or maybe it wasn't the event, but who it was involving.... haha that's a whole other topic... Aaaanywayyyy... and then I came to high school and it was all ALEXIA IS REALLY HOT. Like, what? Me? Really? I am?

I just miss the discovery aspect of high school. I feel like I've seen everything and everyone already now. No one new. It sucks. I need excitement.

I'm glad I got that out.