new year's eve

Today is New Year's Eve, and what better day to reflect on my year than today?

I've changed a whoooole lot this year. I've learned my weaknesses, my strengths, what I need to improve on (school wise, life wise, boy wise, friend wise, personality wise, etc..), what makes me mad and what makes me happy. This was a growing year for me, and I don't regret anything that happened.

I've also learned a lot this year. I've learned how to deal with people and not let people step on me. I've learned that people suck and no one cares, yep. It's true. If you live by that you'll be the strongest person alive.

I'm going to my aunt's house today. I'm going to reflect on my life.

it is officially winter break until January 5 :)

so Christmas just passed... and now I feel like my life has no meaning. as Jane said, the whole year leads up to Christmas and then it's just a downfall from there. I got clothes, shoes, lots of earrings, pajamas, a hat and scarf, jacket, and enough underwear and thongs to last me til I'm 67. yesterday I went to the mall with Sami and Nikki to do some post-Christmas shopping. I only bought a shirt and a lacy thong at Tilly's, ha, where a cute guy rung us up, since all three of us got underwear. and he was like I don't want to touch those. but he did anyway.

and we ran into Zaynab and Olivia. and then we ran into Kevin. aww I miss that kid lots. and we saw this kid in Pac Sun who apparently Nicole is spreading rumors about? I don't know the whole story? but its not my problem? yep. and now I'm here. I'm leaving for a haircut in about five minutes. and then later I'm going out to dinner with the Pavermans, who I haven't seen in awhile and I really miss them

my last post was kind of unnecessary... I forgot that people may actually find this blog and read it. oh well, i was angry. the cast list went up today... I'm in ensemble haha it's okay. she's saving me for next year :P no I don't know. but hopefully, cause me and jennarose and natalie are basc the only underclassmen who got in, and the cast is like COMPLETELY filled with seniors. so whatever. and the leads are people who we never even heard of.. so whatever to them...

don't give me tips about my life

You know what bothers me more than anything in the world?

when people think they're "doing me a favor" by letting me in on something.

For example, let's say you like this guy and a girl tells your friend says "oh, well does (so-and-so) think (so-and-so) still likes her? cause he doesn't... "

THANKS FOR THE INFORMATION

i'm glad you think that by telling me something like that, I'm benefiting. I appreciate (not really) you trying to look out for my best interest (I'm sure) but I don't need advice when i don't ask for it

so big hint to everyone: DON'T "help me out" and think that you telling me your piece of info is going to be doing me a favor. like what you have to say is my golden ticket to Enlightenment

today started out like a normal day... spanish (boring), owens (hell). and then at the end of history, after some assessment on the virginia and kentucky resolution, my head randomly started to hurt. i remember thinking to myself: wow, my head hurts like a BITCH. so being the little pussy that i am, i started to get upset obviously. cause i hate headaches becuase headaches = nausea = throwing up = alexia has a panic attack and dies. so i went to the doctor, and if my stream of headaches don't go away in 2 weeks i have to get tests. like scans and shit. so i'm HOPING they go away and FAAAAST. cause i don't want to get an MRI for a fucking headache. or a strep test, which he said he may have had to do today if my throat was red. i would have actually died. thats my second fear, next to throwing up. its ok, i lead a pathetic life. so i went to the doctors, got home, and watched Tuck Everlasting and What A Girl Wants. my head is still kinda hurting.. i dont know whats wrong with me. but im taking a shower and going to bed early tonight. i need to get more sleep.

Tonight my entire dad's side of my family is coming over for my grandma's birthday. I'm excited :) I haven't seen them in awhile. They're my favorite people ever, for some reason. Maybe it's because I genuinely love every single one of my cousins.

Right now I'm reading Nineteen Minutes. Its sooo good.

I hate my family

For the past half hour I've been sitting in my room doing my homework listening to my fucking brother have a FIT because he can't go to the mall tonight with his friend Matt and this faggot little girls. I hate this kid so much. He is DESTROYING my house. I have the biggest headache of my life right now because I just screamed at my brother for being a DICK to my parents. I hate this house so much and I want to leave and never come back ever ever ever again.